GUEST BLOG: Relationship Love Challenge
GUEST BLOG by Ceza Ouzounian, Relationship coach:
When you think about having an amazing relationship that is full of love, passion and excitement, do you think about working on yourself first?
Or is all your attention on what’s not so good about the relationship and your partner?
If your relationship is going through a rough patch, of course you are going to be fully aware of what’s not working and everything your partner is doing wrong or not doing at all.
But what happens when you take the focus off all of that and work on yourself, how you are feeling, what you are thinking, what beliefs you have that are coming up?
My previous relationship had a lot of issues. The person I was with was not the kind of guy I would have ever chosen to be with. He pushed all my boundaries, he was dismissive of my dreams, my goals, my family and my friends. He always thought he knew better than me. He was quite manipulative and often it was all about him.
Yes, he had lots of stuff to work on, and wasn’t always a nice person.
BUT I was the one who stayed with him and in this relationship. Every time I thought about breaking up (and there were about 6/7 times before I did break up with him) something stopped me. I’m not really sure what those things were, but they stopped me ending the relationship and walking away.
Before I met him I had started working on myself. A year into our relationship, I discovered the Energy Alignment Method (EAM) and had started the process of working on my beliefs, thoughts, emotions, past experiences, relationship, etc, in much more depth.
I discovered so many resistances I had that were affecting me and my choices. A lot of things that had nothing to do with my ex or, in fact, relationships at all, but they were playing a big role in what was happening in my relationship.
It made it really clear that something in me had changed to allow such a person into my life, to allow him to push my boundaries, to allow myself to stay in that relationship.
I kept seeing his potential and the kindness beneath the not so nice person. I was too understanding of his needs, and not assertive enough about my needs and when he had crossed a line. Which encouraged him to continue as he was.
EAM helped me through this relationship a lot! As I worked on myself, it brought more clarity about the decisions I had to make. When I did eventually leave him, I did a lot more work on myself.
I worked on how I was feeling, what I had buried deep from years ago that needed to be released that was affecting my energy, on my confidence and self-worth. I did an overhaul of my energy. By the end I felt like myself again. I felt happy. I was ready to attract the kind of relationship I wanted into my life (which I did).
As a Relationship Coach who has been through the journey of being in an unhappy relationship and worked on herself to create change, I know how important and what a massive difference it makes to relationships.
That is why when I work with clients that is where I start: I start with them.
We all have a part of play in our relationship and only we can change what is happening. Doing the work on you first means you can see your relationship from a different perspective, not from a place of anger, unhappiness, fear, worry. Once you start clearing those strong negative emotions and thoughts, you can start getting clarity on a situation and make better decisions and take aligned actions.
If this is resonating with you and you could do with a boost in your relationship, I am running a Free 5 Days Have A Relationship You Love Experience. During the 5 days you will have daily tasks to complete, understand how your energy affects you, learn how to use EAM and have access to me to ask any questions.
A lot can shift in 5 days. Sign up here: https://bit.ly/RelationshipLoveChallenge
(By Ceza Ouzounian, Relationship Coach)