Why saying yes to being a bridesmaid was a big deal for my confidence…


I got to be a bridesmaid recently at a good friend’s wedding!

I am so happy that I had the confidence to say yes to doing it. 

Deep down I think I had always secretly wanted to experience what it was like to be a bridesmaid but had never had the opportunity before. 

To be honest, I think I had always wanted to be close enough to someone to be considered for this and so I was thrilled to be asked to be part of my friend’s special day.

It was truly such an honour!

Upon reflection, I don’t think that I would have been as happy about it when I was younger.

I wouldn't have had the confidence.

It would have triggered the often-excruciating self-consciousness and anxiety that I used to feel around how I looked. 

I would have felt stressed out about so many eyes being on me and the pressure to do all the right things at the right time during the ceremony and proceedings.

And it would have triggered the phobia I experience - cleithrophobia, which is the fear of being trapped. It would have manifested as fear of being trapped in the situation for the day and would have resulted in lots of overthinking in advance.

When I was preparing for being a bridesmaid I experienced mild shadows of these things, but nothing like what I would have felt in years past.

That is due to the amount on inner work I have done to shift those resistant things from my energy.

When I trained in the Energy Alignment Method, I did so much energy work on myself in the years following that my experience of life completely changed as I got to process and let go of a lot of those limiting and uncomfortable things that I had carried around for years. 

My default setting shifted from being predominantly anxiety and worry influenced, to gaining a significantly deeper-rooted sense of self-worth and confidence within myself to be able to trust that I could handle just about any situation that I face.

Overcoming anxiety and growing in confidence was not an overnight fix

By consistently using the tools I had to clear the layers of unhelpful conditioning and programming within me that were repeatedly keeping me stuck in patterns of feeling anxious and fearful... I got to gradually, bit by bit move forwards and beyond them.

As the resistent energy, thoughts and beliefs were removed from my system there was room for my confidence to grow.

I can’t say that I am now 100% confident about all things or that I don’t ever experience fear or anxiety, or the phobia doesn’t show up sometimes…

BUT… I experience them significantly less now and when they do come up, I can quickly shift it.

I am now no longer a slave to my fears, and I don’t let myself be held back by them. 

I just see them for what they are – layers of unhelpful inner programming that are surfacing ready to be changed into something more empowering.

Inner work… Energy work… It is a lifestyle. Not a one off 

To grow in inner confidence, it takes being proactive and willing show up to do the work as and when it is required on each layer as it surfaces.

It is about being non-judgemental about where you are at with things and about knowing that each step forward is valuable no matter how small.

This investment in myself has been so worth it! 

I have a much better relationship with myself now. Which in turn enables me to have better relationships with those who are important to me. And it enables me to step into each area of my life and work in a much more happy and confident way.

I am now able to happily and confidently say yes to things I want to do, that in the past I might have said no to as they were outside of my comfort zone and my inner critic would have gone crazy at... 

Like getting to be a bridesmaid! Thanks to doing the inner work, I got to say yes to this wonderful experience that I hugely valued and will never forget! 

P.S. If you have an over-active inner critic and would like to change it to being a strength rather than a hindrance, then checkout the free masterclass available on my website here: https://hazeladdleycoaching.com/freebies

For more tips and support around business, confidence, energy alignment and mindset... Check out the Freebies page on my website: https://hazeladdleycoaching.com/freebies

Hazel Addley - Energy Alignment & Mindset Coach

Hazel Addley - Energy alignment and Mindset Coach 

Facebook Instagram - LinkedIn - Twitter - Youtube - Website