Is Your Fear The Bogeyman In Your Life?
What a lot of people don't realise is that fear is standing in their way. When it comes to having a life that you truly love living, it is fear that most likely stands in your way of creating this.
When you think about things in your life that aren't working well, and you allow yourself that lovely yummy dreamy moment where you envisage the wonderful alternative that you often day dream about, how long is it before fear creeps in? Whenever we ponder making a change or doing something new, it is only a matter of time before fear sidles up in the form of the 'yeah, but...'
Try it now. Think about something you'd really like that you don't currently have. Think about really going for it and taking action to get it... How long was it before the 'yeah but' kicked in? (If you are one of the rare people who this doesn't happen for, then I salute you, as your life must be amazing!)
Fear manifests for each of us in different ways. For some it is a voice, others a visual and others a feeling. It is a natural part of our survival mechanism, designed to warn us off from any perceived danger. And this includes the danger of the unknown. Whenever we consider change, let alone take action towards it, our survival inspired fear jumps in to stop us. The 'yeah but' is just one of the tools used in an attempt to keep us safely staying the same and not risking change.
So what do you do about it? When working with coaching clients I look at how fear tries to stop you doing what you want and I teach some tools to manage the hold fear has over you as you create the changes you want in your work or personal life.
The very first step in this process is to become aware of when fear is stopping you. Become conscious about it. Notice when you have that warm and fuzzy thought about a change you want to make and then notice how often the 'yeah but' kicks in and sabotages it.
Create a log of what the positive thought or aspiration was and then record the negative thought or barrier that came up as well.
Do this for a period of time, say a week or a month, and then review what you have learnt:
- What aspirations did you think of?
- How many of them did you action?
- How quickly did the 'yeah but' kick in?
- What fears came up?
- What barriers did the fear place in your way?
- How did you feel looking at all this?
If fear is holding you back from doing what you want to do, let's talk: http://hazeladdleycoaching.com/clarity-consultation.html.