3 Steps To Becoming Naturally Happy And Optimistic
One of my clients once asked me 'how did you do it?' about how I made the transition from being a negative and insecure feeling person to someone who is naturally much more happy and optimistic. At the time I wasn't sure how to answer as it has been a transition over many years involving many small steps.
Having pondered the question a bit more now I can see that I have changed a lot. On both the inside and outside. It is a sense, a feeling, an energy within me that has changed that vibrates out and touches those around me.
I would like to point out that I am not perfect in any way with this. I am still very much on my own journey. But pausing to turn to take a look behind me I can now see just how far I have come.
So what did I do to change how I felt? Well, the first thing was learning that I can change how I feel and making the decision to do it. I honestly did not know this before. I thought that I was subject to my feelings and had no control over them. I used to live bombarded with thoughts, feelings and memories that just plain hurt. Once I learnt that I do have a choice over them, I made the decision to exercise that control to become a more positive person.
Was it that easy? Well, yes, and no. The second part to the process was studying and learning around the topic. This took me on a long and windy road that was individual to me. I believe that this process is unique to each of us and we will be attracted to the right masters and teachings for what we need at any given time. So I just followed the road that interested and intrigued me the most to see where it went.
The third part is that I took action. I applied what I was learning, consistently over time. This changed my limiting beliefs and helped form habits that layered up to elevate me out of my negative state and into happier and much more positive outlook.
The outcome has been that my neutral point is now higher up the emotional scale than before and sits in a much more positive place. I do have tough days, and obviously things happen in life that are outside of my control that have some influence over how I feel. But I am always aware of a deeper happiness and contentment within myself, even when in the throes of experiencing strong negatives. I have also developed a greater resilience so I seem to bounce back quicker to my happy neutral state than I used to.
This process of personal development is not a quick fix. But over time, with consistent steady steps you can develop habits that will make you much stronger and happier within yourself and that will have amazing effects on the rest of your life.
"You would think that taking tiny little steps would seem so trivial. Not true! It is better to take many small steps in the right direction, than none at all. Keep moving and you will pass obstacles that have defeated you before. Even if you don't see results right away, don't give up, because every small step you make towards that goal is affecting you in ways you would never imagine." - Brigitte Nicole
If you would like to make this sort of change yourself, here is an exercise to get you started:
Morning Pages - Every morning upon waking, fill 3 sides of A4 paper with longhand writing. Do this as soon as you can in the morning, every day. Do not edit what you write. You do not need to reread it. Just write. It can be about anything you want. Anything at all that comes to mind. For example, you could write how you are feeling; you could write about your life; your aspirations and hopes; you could tell a story. Basically write anything that you feel drawn to write. It is not to be shared with anyone. These pages are to be kept completely private and are just for you.
I did this exercise everyday for over 6 years, waking up 30 minutes early to make the time, and it helped me to hear my own inner voice and learn a lot about myself. It is a great place to start with exploring who you are and what you want, and you can feel the results immediately. Let me know how you get on!
If this topic speaks to you - let's talk: https://hazeladdleycoaching.com/clarity-consultation.html